Gen Z

Maybe I’m just getting old but… Gen Zs are ruining everything for the rest of us!  

They care less about workin’ hard and more about “meanin’ful gigs” – whatever that means.

Not us “more mature” types. [That’s ma-toor with a t sound, not a che.]

While we’re enjoying a warm cup of milk before our naps, Gen Zs are out there carin’ more about career growth.  

[Spit take.] 

While we’re chewin’ our toothpicks and squintin’ at the distance, Gen Zs want “the empowerment.” 

Oooweee!

While we’re findin’ new ways to crinkle our foreheads, Gen Zs want a workplace that values employee happiness.  

I could go on but my back hurts.  

Edna!  Grab me my hot water bottle!

[Aaaaaand… scene!]  

[Bow with a flourish.]

When business writers are afraid that they’re promoting the completely obvious, they use Gen Zs as a convenient foil.  The writer’s logic is that if your company doesn't make this entirely reasonable change soon– this change that’s been desperately needed in business for decades– well then… at some point (25 years from now), this younger generation– with a healthy sense of purpose and balance– will be in charge and you’ll just be a sad, broken little person sitting in a rocking chair, cursing at the neighborhood kids and regretting your life choices.

I agree btw. 

And I can’t wait.

I’ve already ordered my rocking chair… because if I bought it upon retiring, it simply wouldn’t have today’s quality and workmanship.

Now… seriously… where’s my hot water bottle?