Just Grow Older
If you’re feeling overwhelmed at work, let me save you the trouble of googling “how to deal with stress.” Sleep! Exercise! Meditate! Listen to music! Play a video game! Stop using exclamation marks! Disconnect. Focus on “me time.”
Intuitive enough. But… if we’re being honest…they’re all things we do alone. So googling– in this case– leaves you Facebook lonely… emotionally 6 feet away.
[Thanks Google! Canceling my subscription!]
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A more effective way to manage stress: connect with others.
It’s literally that simple.
And that’s coming from a raging introvert.
[If you only knew how much I hate people!]
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Here are 6 ways to connect— not just to stay calm but to add real joy to the world.
6. Thank people. Not by email (because that’s just keeping you alone). Call them. Video on. Big ol’ smile. Express your gratitude. Be specific. Rinse. Repeat.
5. With our collective return to office in mind… take a lunchtime stroll with ANY co-worker who is available. Get to know them. If you’re not a great conversationalist, play this game with them: figure out one person you both know that doesn’t work in your company. If that’s too easy, add “in a different country.”
4. If no one’s available for that walk, hack your brain by walking alone while listening to an audiobook. Quick science lesson: listening to a book and reading one evoke the same brain activity.. just like engaging in a heated conversation fires the same neurons as yelling at your TV. What does that have to do with anything? Well… pick an audiobook like A Promised Land by Barack Obama. For one thing, he does the reading himself and there’s literally no one on the planet that doesn’t love his voice. More importantly though, you can pause his audiobook every 5 minutes or so and (applying science) say “Really Mr. President? Tell me more!” Unpause and bam! Your brain thinks you’re walking with him! It actually makes me walk faster just to keep up with his bigger stride.
3. Find someone who has transcended from colleague to friend and do whatever you know will make the two of you laugh. For me, it’s being intentionally cringe, preferably with a dark, political edge. I can’t really give a good example. No wait….
2. Do some community service. Zero risk of being alone. Plus you’ll get to feel how the rich feel– when they go to “prison.”
[Crickets.]
And… I left the most obvious for last:
1. Ask for help. Of your manager. Of your peers. Of your network. You’ll be glad you did. And they’ll feel the satisfaction (and joy) of having helped.
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If none of that works, here’s my final final suggestion: just grow older. Not because you get wiser (you don’t) but because the more time passes the more and more you become a honey badger.
If you haven’t seen the video/meme, bing it.